Things Change Mox....

the saying from one of my favorite movies, Varsity Blues. In this case things are changing in our life and I am still figuring out if its for the best or worst. Finding out your husband is cheating on you is about the most gut wrenching thing that can happen to woman other than their child falling ill or worse, has died. That moment when you think life is good and you are making changes in your life to make it even better and then BAM you get hit with something you never thought you would ever hear...Yes, I cheated on you and I want a divorce or I am not in love with you anymore. Life is changing and its changing fast. We just moved 4000 miles away from our family, just unpacked all the boxes and I just started loving Europe, we were making friends and things seemed to be on the up.....so I thought. Now the children and I have to pack back up and move back to Alabama and start over.  Divorcing after 16 years of marriage is extremely hard on top of splitting everything up and trying to keep the peace for the children's sake. But is it for the children's sake? Its very complicated. We get along great. We laugh, joke around and still share common interest. How could someone still do all this and be getting divorced? Selfishness is the answer. Selfishness is a deadly thing to your mind and soul. Its something I was taught to never be but I guess he wasn't. After the other times I found out he was cheating, we worked it out. We went to counseling, started praying together and reading marriage books to help us through the rough patches.I told him Jesus forgives us daily so who am I to not forgive and move past this. I wonder now if he even read those books or even whole heartily tried to become the man he was called to be. Without God your life is empty and dark. Why would somebody want that kind of life? The devil is in control and he has a tight grip on things. With God you know you will one day end up living in a mansion, singing with Angels and living with our Lord Savior for eternity. Yes, the devil makes everything look so much better. He makes "her" seem 100% better than what you have already. That's just it though, he makes it seem more desirable and better....just like Eve in the Garden of Eden. Why cant men/women that cheat realize when they are doing this it is hurting so many more people and not worth the pain and agony it brings on the family. Again selfishness comes into play. So what I am doing about it? I am praying daily for him and using this hell I am living to turn my life around. When you live with someone that doesn't give you respect you deserve and make you feel so ugly inside and out it really damages you. I am using this moment in my life to get healthy. I have started running and working out. I have lost 30 pounds since January. The sad thing is he never noticed until I asked him about it. I don't plan on stopping at 30 pounds lost. I plan on going all the way to 100 pounds lost. I have 70 more to go. I am looking at life differently. My goal is to think positive about every situation, starting with my husbands affair. If he hadn't of slipped again I would still be in the dump of life just going through the motions caring for him and the kids but never taking the time for myself. Not saying what he did was right or that he is excused from this, I am saying everything happens for a reason. God doesn't give us something we cant handle.I truly believe and I am so much stronger now.Through prayer and having support from my family and friends I will overcome this. The sad part is it took this happening for me to open my eyes and see where I was headed. I had thought about suicide a lot but I couldn't do that to my kids and family. Maybe God decided this was the best thing for me to go through. It sucks, it sucks bad. I loved my husband and still do and I would have moved the world to make him happy, when all a long he would not have done the same for me, and I am still asking myself why I love him, trust me. I married for better or worse, he did not. My marriage could be fixed but when its a one way street it cant happen. I pray each day he will find what he is missing and will one day open his eyes to what he is leaving behind.  Our children are the real ones suffering here. Not having both parents there to support them at everything they do and to make memories as a family really just sucks for them. That is extremely sad to me. All because one person was so selfish and couldn't get over himself. I also pray my children learn from the mistakes made and will one day find a love worth working for everyday. I was willing to do that....

Shocking, I know!

So it has been a while since I have blogged. With Facebook and Twitter it seems kind exhausting to keep up with all of it. For some reason I have felt this pull to start blogging again. Our lives have been in a whirl wind for a little while with travels, school, projects, trying to sell a house and so on. So be on the look out for some crazy blogging :)

TIme for School!

This is the first year I forgot to take a picture of the kids going to school on their first day :( I guess they are just too grown up to take their picture holding their lunchbox and backpack on ready to go tackle that first day. I can hardly believe Zac is in the 6th grade and Ali in the 5th. Time flies and it is so sad. I feel like I was just dropping them off at Kindergarten in Nebraska.


This year Zac will be taking band rather than PE. He will be playing the percussion. I wonder if he is only taking band so he doesn't have to do PE?? Time will tell. .......

its been a while!

I know it has been forever since I have posted stuff. We have been pretty busy this summer. JR has been working non-stop and it is really getting to him. We are going on vacation next week to Orlando! We are super excited!! The military has great deals and we couldn't turn it down. We are going to Universal Studios and Sea World. For the 4th of July we went to Callaway Gardens and to Six Flags with some close friends. We had a blast. I learned that Zac loves roller-coaster and Ali isn't so sure about them , on one roller coaster I turn to her and she was white as a ghost yelling : I AM GOING TO DIE!!!!! I almost peed in my pants, I was laughing so hard! After that ride, she took it easy and hung out with JR.

I just celebrated my 31 birthday, I know I am getting old! JR got me an awesome mini-laptop and his parents got me spectacular Lime Green DS! Now I can play scrabble everywhere I go!! THANK YOU AGAIN!

School is almost back in session. We have a few weeks left and then it is back to the "real world" of getting up and gettin' goin' :) I am currently looking at going to College. I am waiting on paperwork and then I can get the process started. I want to get a degree to have to fall back on and to feel like I accomplished something. I am not really working right now. I am helping Helga with her book and I help Mrs.Clara out sometimes. My foot is really the source of me not being able to work. I hope the doctors can give me relief soon!

So, what's going on with everyone this summer?? Any vacations to speak of???

IT'S SUMMER!

The kids are out of school now and they are ready to sleep in and swim all day. I am ready to sleep in as well. Zac will be going to Camp Wiregrass at the end of June so that is exciting for him. Also, this summer he will be taking drum lessons. He will hopefully be joining the band for middle school. When we went to the band fair everyone kept talking to Ali asking her what she wanted to play and Ali would give them her crazy look and I would have to say she is not joining the band its Zac that is joining. They could not get over how old he looked for a 10 year old. Most of the teachers thought he was already in middle school. It was very funny,it made him feel good I think.

Before school was let out there was awards day. I took pictures but they turned out pretty bad, sorry. Zac received his "Diploma" and Ali received an award for A/B honor roll and an award for most hard working student (or something like that). Zac also got up in front of everyone and read scripture from the Bible. I was very proud of him for doing that!

Most of you know I just had another foot surgery. This surgery has me in bed for a while so I can heal. My last surgery did not take so this one the doctor said he is confident about. I am not liking this being in bed with my feet up thing. It is killing me. I feel like every part of my body hurts from just laying around. I am not a lazy person so this is rather hard for me. I will survive though. The kids are doing a great job helping me out when JR is at work. They are also doing a great job keeping the house clean. I think I would go out of my mind knowing the house was a mess and I couldn't do anything about it.

JR has pushed 4 classes so far at OTS. He will be pushing his 5th this summer and hopefully that will be it for him and he can move on to something new. JR will also be having PRK on his eyes at the end of this month. We will be heading to Mississippi for a full week for the surgery. It will be nice to get away from Montgomery but it will also suck in a way since he will be some what blind while we are there. The military is doing his surgery so pray they know what they are doing!

Now to our dogs....Violet is growing more and more everyday. When she stands on her hind legs she is as tall as Ali. She weighs about 45 pounds right now. We are still trying to potty train her but she like to just pee as she walks,no time to stop I guess. She will learn!! Zoey and Delilah are just as crazy as anything. I think they finally like their new sister. Pictures will come once I can walk again.

So hopefully that got you caught up with the Diboll family :) Now time for me to take some pain medicine and try to relax this foot.

Spring pics

Zac is now in the 5th grade! He is growing up fast!

Ali got to show off her regular clothes instead of there regular uniforms.

Weekend get-a-way

Last weekend JR surprised me with a weekend away. He set the whole thing up. Abi, JR's sister took care of the kids. The kids had a blast. They went bowling and to the movies all in one day. For us we went to a AWESOME restaurant called Garrett's. The food was amazing. I even ate a meal without asking them to take out something...I know SHOCKING! I had the Braised Lamb, it just melted in my mouth. JR had fish, that I even tried. If you live in Montgomery you have to try this place out!!

On Saturday we went to the spa that was located in our hotel. It was very fancy, a great place for "the girls" to go for a day. JR and I were separated the whole time other than when we had our couples massage. Being separated kind of sucked since the whole purpose of us going there was to spend time together, but it was a nice time to say the least.

As I mentioned in my other blog, I had foot surgery on Monday so I am laid up in bed on the kids Spring Break. I hate that I had to have surgery on their Spring Break but it had to be done. I hope we can make it up to them this summer by going on a few vacations. We are planning to go to Abilene to see some friends and maybe down to Sea World then (crossing our fingers) going to Disney World. The military gets amazing deals at both places this year so hopefully we can take advantage of those deals. What a fun road trip that will be! I am getting excited already!!

So that is what has been going on here, how about you?