Funny thing happened tonight

Just when I start to accept the fact the we will move this summer JR gets a phone call. The phone call basically was letting him know that we have a choice to make. This isnt any choice,this is a scary choice! We can either move now or wait until summer. What to do,what to do?? I just went through this trying to get the house ready and preparing the kids etc. Now to do it again so soon,I just dont know! I do know that I want to move and start our life fresh again. I dont want to leave my good friends and Mrs.Marion behind but I know that we need to move on and focus on JR's career. We will get back into church and become close again with family and friends in Montgomery. Lots of pros and lots of cons. I guess what I really need to do is stop freaking out and pray about it. WOW life sure does know how to throw a curve ball when you least expect it. We have to tell the AF what we have decided on Monday so I will let everyone know!

to be continued......

PS my spell check isnt working and i knwo I cant spell so no joking!

EXCITEMENT?

Why is that we get so excitited about something but when the time or thing comes we are not excited anymore. I remember when I was younger I would like a guy and try to get him to notice me,and once he did the excitement was gone and I was ready to move. Is it more fun to dream about it and wonder, rather than it actually happening? I think I am like that about heaven. I want to go to heaven but lately I havent wanted to do the things it takes to get there. I dream about how it will be but I am scared because I am afraid of what will happen when the time comes. I use to get excited to go to church to see everyone and get "spiritual filled" . I miss those days. I am so sad the BH had to turn out like it did. We were all so close,so it seemed. I miss eating out with everyone on Sunday nights and sharing a meal together on Wednesday evening. I hope that one day I can find that type of family again. But that is me being excited about whats to come but when it is actually time will I run away again?

Good News??

So we get news yesterday that the RIF board has been canceled. All that stress and our orders being put on hold,was it for nothing? I know everything happens for a reason, but holy cow I was about to commit myself to the crazy people's home. I wonder if all that I did and went through was just a lesson that God wanted to teach me. What did I learn from it?? I learned not to trust the Air Force and never jump the gun with preparing the house to be packed. So did I actually get what I needed from that lesson,I may never know.

I do know why I am glad we are still in Abilene....so JR and I can work on our marriage before he starts working 18 hour days at OTS,I get to spend more time with my close friends and watch Emma grow more and I will be here a little longer to take care of Marion. And lets not forget now I can watch Ace while Barb is away....and I wont be in the process of moving :)

So I guess I am finally realizing that just because life isn't going the way I want it to,life still goes on and just try to make the best of it. I just need to put things in Gods hands and stop trying to run the show.

Six Months

So JR has been gone for over six months now. He is to return Lord Willing on Friday. Should I be nervous,scared,anxious? Well, right now I am all over the board. When I think about him coming home my stomach gets weak feeling and my heart skips a beat. How can I be so upset and angry at him but want him at the same time? Our marriage is going through a lot right now and I am just scared I wont be able to let go of the past and look forward to the future. Over all JR is a pretty good guy...other than some things but why am I so nervous about seeing him? Sometimes I feel like with him coming home I will have to face him and face head on what has been going on. How do I learn to forgive him?? I feel lost and empty.

3 am! What he heck!!

So I guess I fell asleep around 11pm last night and I was wide awake at 1:45am. I shoudl have just turned over,prayed and tried to go back to sleep but that would have been too easy. It is now after 3am and I wish I had just rolled over. I have so much on my mind that I just couldnt shut everything off,I guess.

Do you ever have these tyoe of nights? I know most of my friends do. They are the ones sleeping right now I bet and I am the one awake. So what to do what to do?? I have already checked my email,watched enouh dumb TV and let the dogs out to potty. It so cold out there! 23 degrees it what the computer said but it feels like 0 degrees. That wind is still so stong. I thought wind died down at night but I guess it Abilene it doesn't. Abilene is one of those cities that one minute is can be hot and then next minute it will be cold and raining. Gotta love the Air Force for sending here though.

Speaking of Air Force.....why is it that you fill out a dream sheet and you don't get anything close to what you wanted? Why have us fill that out if we can't go where we want to? Seems like a waste of time and energy for the Military person to do it. I guess we should just be thankful we have a place to live. Abilene isn't that bad though. It has really built up since we moved here. You know we are moving up in the world if you get a Kohl's. Now all we need is an Apple Bee's are we are set,so we think. I could also use a Famous Dave's (the best BBQ place you will ever eat at). I do miss their BBQ pork pulled sandwich and pretty much everything else on their menu. i think I must be hungry or delirious,or both. Yum...BBQ!

OK I am going to try the sleeping thing again,hopefully it works this time. I will keep going on and on if I don't stop typing now. I am afraid of where this blog will go. It will be called delirious mom with nothing to do beside to sleep and SHE CAN'T!

Third Grade Math!

So apparently I need to go back to third grade. I can not figure out this math problem Ali brought home today. I called several people and they couldn't figure it out either so then I didn't feel so stupid. Here is the question:

Paula struck out twice,walked four times and had five hits. If she continues to bat this way, the probability the she will get a hit the next time she bats is ____ out of _____

So you figure it out and tell me! I think it is 6 out of 10 but I am not good as math so...

On that note....my kids want me to home school them. Can you guess what I told them? Your right! There is no way in in heck I would do that. I cant even answer a 3 rd grade question. Zac's in 4th grade. I couldn't even imagine what I would do with his school. When I could teach them there ABC's and 123's that is when I could home school but they are past that point!

Computers

Why am I so crazy about computers? I am always checking my e-mail and getting on the Internet to see what some crazy celebrity has done today! Now my computer downstairs at my desk doesn't work. I have been trying to get it to connect to the Internet for the last two days. I am freaking out! I hate but LOVE computers all at once. Now I have to use JR's old lap top upstairs that can only get on the Internet if it is connected right it the cable modem. I know I need to get personal help but I guess I am like most people in the world,I just want to stay connected so I wont miss anything. Thank goodness I have Internet connection on my cell phone. What would I do in line while waiting to be checked out or at that red light that takes just too long?? I know what I should be doing,that is praying and spending time in thought but who wants to do that?? I know..everyone should I just need to get my priorities straight I guess :)

Now on another note...why do people say " Is it cold enough for you?" What does that mean?

I am bored can you tell....I need a life!

Traveling with 2 kids and 2 dogs! NO FUN!!

So,I never thought in a million years I would actually travel with 2 kids and 2 dogs by myself. I am proud to say I have now done that! I have always thought that I couldn't take on that task. I will say it isn't the most funniest thing that I have done in my life but it is kind of nice. I get to set the pace on where we go,when we stop and what we eat. Now when we get to the hotel I don't get to watch what I want or say when we go to sleep but I am the boss on the road! Speaking of the road.....who in the heck sets the speed limits on these roads? Now really don't you think we could go faster than 70 miles per hour?? All of us go at least 5 over the limit if not more. Everyone knows you can go 5 over and you wont get pulled over, unless you get a cop that isn't having a good day or something. Now whats up with these gas prices? One exit will have 3.09 and then a mile up the road it will be 2.95! I have learned my lesson! I just keep going until I see a better deal. I am so cheap!

Hotels....they are so nasty! I have to say they are better than staying in your car over night but still,cant the maid clean the hair out of the bathroom from the former guest? Why cant they just do their job and not make me get sick looking and that crap! I am just in a crappy way I guess right now :) I am ready to be back in my own CLEAN no hairy house I guess! I have been on the road living out of a suite case for over 10 days,it is time to be back home!

Kids....why is it that when they are in the car they are so sleepy and they want to stop for the evening so they can rest in a bed but as soon as we walk into the room all heck breaks loose and they all the sudden are full of energy and they are bouncing off the walls?